


The Triceratops Next Door

by forbala



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Drinking, Drunken Shenanigans, Inspired by Real Events, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-09
Updated: 2020-01-09
Packaged: 2021-02-20 06:22:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 777
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22179520
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/forbala/pseuds/forbala
Summary: A night out drinking turns into something more exciting.
Relationships: Akaashi Keiji/Bokuto Koutarou, Kuroo Tetsurou/Tsukishima Kei
Comments: 15
Kudos: 104





	The Triceratops Next Door

**Author's Note:**

> Inspired by [this](https://www.bbc.com/news/uk-england-hampshire-35579159) article my coworker showed me today. Bless drunken bastards everywhere.

Tsukishima was drunk. Granted, so were Kuroo, Bokuto, and Akaashi, but a drunk Tsukishima was both rare and precious. He didn’t get drunk often— how could you even get drunk off Kahlúa and milk?— but when he did, his boyfriend reveled in the experience.

The four of them had gone out to a bar hours ago, then to another bar, and another… Anyway, now, they were wandering down the street, shambling like the drunks they truly were. Kuroo had one arm each around Tsukishima and Bokuto, and on Bokuto’s other side, even Akaashi was stumbling. Kuroo loved his friends.

“I love you guyysssssss,” he cooed. “You— you’re the best!”

“Yeah!” Bokuto replied, yelling loudly, but Kuroo could only laugh.

Akaashi shushes them, but then starts singing off-key so no one listens to him.

“I want… to party…” Tsukishima slurs.

Kuroo laughs and leans over to kiss him on the cheek. Tsukishima fusses and pulls away. Kuroo leans over to follow him, determined to leave a kiss on his precious boyfriend’s precious face, but it doesn’t pan out. Bokuto leans after Kuroo without meaning to and pulls Akaashi with him, so soon they’re stumbling and falling in a pile on top of Tsukishima, all but the latter giggling like little kids.

“Noooo, get off,” Tsukishima groans, pushing weakly at the men laying on top of him. Kuroo finally lands a kiss, first on his cheek then on his mouth, then moving down to his neck and licking. Tsukishima is pinned; he has no escape.

On top of Kuroo, Bokuto and Akaashi start making out.

“You guys,” Tsukishima whines, but he cuts himself off with a moan when Kuroo bites his collarbone. “Stop, Tetsurou, lemme up.”

“Okay, okay, but we’ll have to break up this pair,” Kuroo mumbles, kissing Tsukishima one last time. 

They do, finally, manage to break apart Bokuto and Akaashi and the foursome manage to stagger upright once again. They’re meandering— it can’t be confused for walking, it’s much too indirect— down the street when Tsukishima spots it.

“WHOA!” he yells, pointing. “Look, look! It’s a real dinosaur!”

Bokuto yelps and curls around Akaashi, flinging one arm out as if to defend them from the beast. Kuroo cackles and doubles over, nearly falling again.

“‘S not real, babe,” he gasps out.

Tsukishima cocks his head in study. “Oh. Yeah. You’re right.”

“Aww, you’re so disappointed,” Akaashi teases, reaching out and clumsily patting Tsukishima’s face, an attempt to comfort him.

Tsukishima ignores them all and stumbles over to it. It’s a huge Triceratops and Tsukishima looks up at it in wonder. “It’s amazing,” he says when they join him.

“I’m gonna climb it,” Bokuto says, releasing Akaashi’s hand and striding over to it.

He doesn’t get very far, falling several times before he just gives up, sitting on the ground beside the leg.

“You know what— would be hilarious,” Akaashi says, thinking slowly.

~~~~~~

Tsukishima wakes up with a headache and a stomachache. He moans as he rolls out of bed and goes to the bathroom. He doesn’t throw up, but it’s a near thing. When he has brushed his teeth, he goes back to the bedroom and pulls on a sweatshirt before going into the living room and collapsing on the couch.

“Morning, Kei,” Kuroo calls out, a little too loud.

“Fuck off,” he grunts.

“Turn on your tablet, if you will, darling.” Kuroo comes over with a glass of water in one hand and a cup of coffee in the other, setting both on the coffee table and forcing Tsukishima to make room for him on the couch.

“Why?” Tsukishima asks, eyeing him suspiciously.

“Just do it.” Kuroo looks at him with a raised eyebrow and Tsukishima sighs and picks up the tablet, turning it on.

On the screen is a news article showing a picture of— 

“A dinosaur?” Tsukishima asks, confused. He reads the article quickly, brief as it is.

_A 7.6m long dinosaur was left in the middle of the street last night. Its owner Ashido Satori was shocked to find it in the road when he arrived at the property this morning. “It takes at least three or four of us to move that thing,” he said, “so it was definitely a serious effort. I’m sure drink was involved.”_

_The dinosaur is part of his garden where he sells prehistoric gems, fossils, and toys._

_City officials have moved the dinosaur back to its home and Ashido has plans to bolt it down to prevent this happening again._

Tsukishima looks up at his boyfriend. “Did we…?”

Kuroo nods, fighting back a smirk and failing. “We did.”

Tsukishima groans and hides in his hoodie.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! Drink water before you go to bed to prevent hangovers   
> ( ˘ ³˘)♥


End file.
